A Letter to Mother Nature

~ I am sharing a letter I wrote to Mother Nature during the Spring of 2020, while we were still living near Madison, Wisconsin. Enjoy! ~

Dear Mother Nature,

What the frick’?!!!!

The local weather forecast called for snow today. I look outside and I can see it blowing around on the wind. Wind, which may I add, that is blowing ferociously.

One should not be able to casually use the word “ferocious” to describe any aspect of weather. The only exceptions should be in describing tornados or hurricanes. However, neither is the case in this instance.

I know that, because as I look outside at the horizontally blowing snow, I can see sunshine and blue skies. Let me repeat that. Sunshine. and. Blue. Skies. So…snow and beautiful blue skies.

All of which is neither here nor there.

My true gripe, and the reason why I am writing this letter, is the pollen count. YES, I SAID POLLEN COUNT. Why, oh why, do we have a HIGH pollen count on a day when there is snow???

Mother Nature, are you broken?

Should we call someone?

I realize April is a tough month for you, but THIS?!! This is going overboard. We humans cannot be asked to worry about our nasal allergies while simultaneously wondering where we put the snow shovels. It’s not decent!

PlUS, there is this little thing called Covid-19 going around now. You may have heard of it.  Some people suspect one of your little animal friends helped start it. It’s got us all a bit on edge.

In short, we’ve had just about enough of you and your shenanigans lately!

Do us a favor. Take a deep breath. Exhale sloooooowly.

Pull yourself together.

Now.

What do you say we to a few days of nice bright sunny 75 degree weather? No excessive wind. Moderate pollen counts. NO SNOW. Especially, no snow.

Sincerely,

Those with Itchy Eyes and Noses, Those Who Hate Winter, and Those Who Just Want a Break from the Craziness

P.S. The hail just now…..so not nice! Not nice at all!!